Ahem.

To elaborate on the List of Things That Can Go Suck It.

1. The cashier at Wegman's. Please don't give me false hope by saying "Are you sure they got the date right?" when I tell you that I have three weeks left. It makes me discouraged. Don't you know I already nearly cried like 4 times in past hour? Due in part to...

2. The 90 frajillion old people that gave me dirty looks in the grocery store. Yes, I know my toddler is screaming. Yes, I am trying to quiet her down. Yes, that means that I am in the process of opening a box of animal crackers that I have not yet actually purchased. I am going as fast as I can, she has already eaten through a slice of ham, a pita pocket, a bottle of water, and 2 bites of summer squash (which was actually an accident. I didn't realize she was eating that. I put it in the cart and turned to look at something else and when I looked back she was saying "Nana! Nana!" and happily chomping away. In her defense, it does look very much like a banana. Although she shouldn't be eating a banana with the peel still on, but hey. Which brings me to item 3 on my List of Things That Can Go Suck It).

3. The carts at Wegmans. Okay, I think it's totally cool that you put space for two children to be buckled into the cart. I also like the fact that you have a parking garage so that I don't have to go out into the rain. And if I was shopping alone I'm sure I would like this feature of a multi-level cart. However, I DO NOT like that idea when shopping with a toddler. It really limits the amount of groceries I can put in that cart, because that top level (which, when shopping alone, I'm sure is perfect for those eggs or bread that you inevitably pick up first and then squash underneath all your canned goods) is TOTALLY reachable by the toddler buckled into the cart, rendering that entire level unusable. Well, I mean, you can use it. But said toddler may end up eating some summer squash.

That's it for now. And lest I include only my bitter diatribes about how ridiculously irritable I am today, I will also include the fact that I had my 37-week checkup with the doctor today. I've gained another pound since last week (putting the total gain at 28. Dammit. This child better come in the next 2 weeks, I'd really like to keep the gain at under 30.), but my blood pressure is great, baby is measuring exactly the right size, has a nice strong heartbeat, and is head-down. It's all a matter of waiting.

Things That Most Certainly Do Not Suck and Will Get Me Through Today

1. My half-caf, double tall, 2 pump, nonfat, no whip, Cinnamon Dolce Latte. Yes, I am one of those people. Deal with it.

2. My lovely husband who takes the baby to work with him while I go to my doctor appointments. I mean, come on. How awesome is that?

3. New friends who call me out of the blue because they're "on the way to the grocery store and thought of you and how we both hate grocery shopping with a passion!" and then proceed to talk about the evils of the grocery store and the likelihood that we will inadvertently teach our children all the best cuss words. (Note to self: probably should stop saying things like "Honey, you really need to calm down and be a good girl or Mama is seriously going to lose her shit." in the middle of the grocery store, within hearing distance of glary-type old person. Might also help cut down on the glares from old people.)

4. The knowledge that by the end of this afternoon my kitchen is going to be amazingly clean and organized. I have SUCH a big plan, you don't even know. It involves making lists and then pulling things out of cabinets, and I just might have plans to take an actual written inventory of what foodstuffs I have and then create schematics for how it should all fit into the cabinets/fridge/freezer. Yes. I am that obsessive. I did it when I worked at Starbucks and it did wonders for ease of ordering and use of products on hand. I see no reason why my kitchen should not operate in the same way.

Peace out, y'all.

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So close and yet so. Damn. Far.

Tomorrow I'll hit the 37-week mark on this pregnancy. I don't know how in the hell I am going to make it. I'm definitely done with the whole being pregnant thing, but then I remember that to not be pregnant anymore means to have to care for a toddler AND an infant. Annnnnnd then I'm okay with still being pregnant.

Now, I will regale you with Some Things That Have Bothered Me Recently.

1. I DO NOT want to hear about "how HUGE I am getting" or that I "look like I'm about to pop". Trust me. I feel enormous enough without your reminding me every. single. damn. morning. when I get to work. Please remember that when I get to your house to watch your daughter, it is 7am and I probably woke up approximately 6 minutes prior to seeing you. I am most definitely still in my pajamas, have barely contained my bedhead, and may or may not have brushed my teeth. I am probably still half-asleep, and that's alright because your daughter does not wake up for another hour, during which I will have time to mainline a cup of coffee. And yes, I am still drinking caffeinated coffee while pregnant. Sue me. But so help me god, if you tell me ONE MORE TIME that I'm "moving so slowly these days" or that I "look like a woman on a mission to just have this baby now" I swear I will flip the eff out.

2. Okay. So maybe I'm not the biggest pregnant woman you've ever seen. In fact, I'm fairly certain I'm not. But let me assure you that this is the biggest that I, personally, have ever been. So I would like to reserve the right to complain without you telling me how you had it so much worse. Commiserate, yes please, by all means. But seriously, unless you're hugely pregnant RIGHT NOW, I feel worse at this particular moment in time, so please give me my turn to be the whiny little snot.

2a. I would also like to give a shout out to all the women that have told me that I "look so cute" and tell me that I'm lucky cause I "only got a belly!" and that my stomach "looks like one of those fake pregnancy bellies on tv!". Please feel free to continue such comments, as long as you allow me to thank you and then continue to bitch about how huge I feel.

3. Pelvic pain can go suck it. Same goes for back pain.

4. Uhhh, that's actually pretty much it for today. That's all that's bothering me.

Things are actually going along just fine. Babygirl continues to be ridiculously cute, which very nearly makes up for the crankiness in the afternoon when all I want to do is sit on the couch with a heating pad on my back. I am slowly slowly making my way through the to-do-before-baby-gets-here list I have. Which isn't actually written out in list form, and so makes things sort of difficult. Problem is, every time I get out a pen and a notepad, it is stolen by a 17-month-old and as a result there may be pen marks all over our couch...

37-week doctor visit tomorrow. Expect a full report.

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Down but not out

Sunday morning we got up on time. We got out of bed on time. We happily started getting ready for church, hoping hoping HOPING to actually make it on time for once. I dressed the baby, picked out a cute sundress with leggings for myself, then decided that it was a little too chilly for the sundress alone, so I bent down to grab a sweater (out of the ridiculously out of control pile of clean/semi-clean clothes on the bedroom floor) and bam. Shooting horrific pain exploding all over my entire, but especially lower, back. It dropped me to my knees, and I nearly burst into tears as I called Nate to "come help me, quick! My back went out!"

And so, we didn't make it to church at all. Nate managed to somehow cart my pregnant ass over to the bed and get me all situated. I'm not gonna lie, I was in some serious pain any time I tried to move any muscle at all... so I spent Sunday in bed. Monday I felt a bit better, but still needed to take it easy, so my amazing husband took the day off from work so that he could take care of Fi and I could stay in bed another day. (He did offer by saying he would "do all the maid work, like cleaning the kitchen and putting away the laundry and taking care of the baby", which made me ask if he had just called me a maid, and he quickly backpedaled and tried to pull his foot out of his mouth real quick... but it was all good.)

Now here it is Wednesday, I'm feeling much better, but by the mid-afternoon my back is still pretty much done. Had a slight pregnant freak-out moment this afternoon... concerning what one of my favorite bloggers has termed the "pregnancy fluids of mystery." After a google-induced worry-fest of an afternoon, Nate convinced me to give my doctor a call. I did, and they had me come on in, and turns out that no, I was not in fact leaking any amniotic fluid. It's totally normal to be just that gross. The doctor nicely lied to me and told me they'd always rather I come and have it be nothing than the other way around, and no, I wasn't "that patient" just because of this and because I called the doctor on call over the weekend asking if maybe there was more I could do for my back than tylenol and rest?

Anyways. Everything continues to look fine, baby-wise, and I still have to go in for my regular visit next week. I'm officially 36 weeks today, so at this point any time I go into labor is fine, but ugh. You know it's gonna be a najillion years till that happens.

The child will. not. get. out. of. my. ribcage. Also, is causing horrific amounts of heartburn that no amount of Tums will cure. We had big plans to make real dinner tonight, (on the grill, even!) but as usual, all I feel like I can handle eating is a bowl of cereal. So once again, Nate's doing dinner for himself and the chickie. Maybe tomorrow I'll feel up to eating.

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35 Weeks

It. Is. Hot.

In April. It is nearly 90 degrees, for the third day in a row now! I am miserable with summer heat combined with spring allergies and of course all the fun stuff that come with the whole being pregnant thing... ugh.

Okay. I will try to stop complaining. We're supposed to have some serious rain tomorrow, and that should help with both the allergies and the heat, so I'm looking forward to that.

Had my 35-week checkup today. Everything continues to progress nicely, there's really nothing to report. Heartbeats good, baby is measuring right on the money, I've gained a pound since my last visit, which puts me up to 26 lbs. I'm reallllllly hoping to keep it to 30 lbs total, but we'll see if that works. I think it will just come down to how long I go. They gave me the "here's when to call us and when to go to the hospital blah blah and we won't stop your labor once you hit 36 weeks" paper today at my appointment. So we've got one more week to go, and then baby is welcome to come at ANY POINT. Although, I have no expectations of seeing him/her this month. I think we all remember Miss Fiona and her "I think I'd like to be a week and a half late" attitude. I'm prepared to endure another 5 full weeks of the heartburn and the Braxton-Hicks contractions and the kicks to the lungs and the existing on ice cream and breakfast cereal. Because yes, once again this pregnancy all I want to eat is cereal and ice cream. Somehow it's not working quite as well on the weight control this time though... though that probably has more to do with the fact that I haven't been exercising nearly as much. Last time I was walking for at least an hour, 3 or 4 times a week... this time I'm lucky to get out once a week. Eh. Maybe if I step it up here at the end it will still give me some of the benefits at the end of pregnancy. And since the weather is supposed to cool down and be ACTUALLY SPRING next week, maybe I'll actually be able to get out there.

Well, Finn is currently napping, so I'm gonna end here and try to grab a little sleep myself. If I don't I will be mucho cranky by this afternoon's end.

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