It's probably gonna be a madhouse, but...

IKEA tomorrow!

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Follow-up

To answer the questions I am SURE you have.

1. It isn't.
2. Kind of.

Cause I'll put good money on you wanting to know how the potty training is going and if I am still working out diligently.

To clarify- it's the potty training that isn't. And the working out... well, it hasn't comPLETEly stopped. I worked out this morning, so yay me! I did great the first week. Every day for a solid week. Then I missed the weekend. Then 5 more days on. Then it was VIOLETS BAPTISM EXTRAVAGANZA WEEKEND and I missed the weekend and a couple more days after that. And then the past week has been spotty at best. But as I mentioned- I did it this morning, so here's hoping I can continue. Sounds crazy, but it seems I am actually more likely to get up at exercise at 6am before work than if I can sleep in and wake up before the kids at 8:30 and do it. Sooooo yeah. Work starts up again next week, mayhap that will get me in gear again.

Now as to the potty training- after a solid 5 days of staying at home and feeding the child m&ms, I came to the realization that I was so. fricking. tired. of. it. all. Also, she did not seem to be catching on. So, I decided to put the lid on that little experiment and revisit it a a month or two. Maybe by then she'll be more ready. We've still got potties out and undies around, so she can use those at will until I decide to fully commit again. Plus, I sort of ate the entire 2lb bag of m&ms.

Hmm... what else has been happening around here? Well, we've had several visitors- Nate's mom was in town for a couple weeks, that was awesome. My sister Kelsie was here, and then the insanity that is my family was here for the baptism weekend, and then Mickey stayed a few days after that. Don't get me wrong, family. I love each of you dearly. But that weekend was fairly nutso. It did not help that it rained the day of the baptism and I had 40+ people (many of them noisy children) in my little townhouse. But it was a fun kind of nutso. We went out to dinner one night at a really nice restaurant out in National Harbor. My aunt basically designed the entire place, so that was way cool to see. If you're in the area and in search of some FANTASTIC crab cakes or artichoke-spinach dip (among other things), I would highly recommend you check out McLoone's Pierhouse. Great service, gorgeous waterfront view, just a really nice evening. .

There was something else I wanted to plug... OH YEAH. My little sis (an art student in Boston) has a new-ish Etsy site where she sells all sorts of artsy things like handmade journals and notebooks and whatnot... she's super rad. You should totes check it out.

What else... oh yeah. My children are basically TOO ADORABLE FOR WORDS.

Fiona in the midst of some crazy, joker-inspired fingerpainting.

Violet in the swing, blissfully unaware of the suckfest that is the Sox this season.

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Better Late Than Never

Like every other mommy type blogger under the sun, I have decided to do the 30-Day Shred. The difference is that everyone else did it like two years ago when the DVD actually came out. I'm doing it now. That makes me special and definitely not a crowd follower, right? Right?!?!?! Right.

ANYWAYS.

Bottom line is- ouch. The way the whole thing works is, it's a half hour, every day, for a month (or however long your crazy ass wants). I'm gonna shoot for a month and see where that gets me. I, like pretty much every person I know, have done like a billion different "I'm gonna get in shape" things, usually starting in January, or the beginning of a month, or the beginning of a week at least, buuuuuut. Last night I just decided that I'd had enough, I was starting asap. And when it's 3am, ASAP is most definitely the next day.

I've weighed in, taken my before pictures, I'll take measurements as soon as I can locate the damn measuring tape, and I will be holding on to those so that I can completely WOW you with my progress a month from now.

But the workout itself- uh, yeah. For a half hour thing, it's pretty intense for my little out of shape self. I was surprised. Push-ups?!?! HA. Def had to do the girlie ones, on my knees. And even those were brutal. After I finished the workout (Nate watched the babies while I did it, the guy has promised to back me up in this endeavor, up to and including pushing me to workout even when I don't want to. I promised to try not to get mad at him for that.), my arms were sore, my legs hurt in walking up the stairs. I'm a little worried about how I'll be feeling tomorrow. But I shall push through and work through it and I shall WIN and fit back into my old clothes and it shall be AMAZING.

I've also decided that I will go to bed earlier. No staying up until 3am. I get crazy ideas late at night.

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Potty Trainings. I has it.

We are two days into this potty training thing. Non-parents, I totally get if you skip this post. It's really okay.

Before you say anything- yes, she's young. But she's not that young, and she's shown a real interest in the potty (we've had it sitting out in the bathroom for a couple months now), and so if I can take that interest and channel it into less diapers? All for it. Plus, she's got a booty rash right now and so needs to be pantless for a couple days anyways, so why the hell not.

As I was saying. We are two days in. Yesterday there was a LOT a peeing in the big girl panties in the morning. Like, a lot. But it got better. Then this morning she did AWESOME. She peed in the potty like every 3 minutes for an hour. (Yeah, pretty sure she's no dummy. She learned pretty quick that pee in potty=m&m. Hence the need to empty the potty every 4 drops.) (Also she freaking LOVES to wash her hands.)

We even had, wait for it, POOP in the potty!!! I was taking a small break from monitoring her every move, looking for signs of pee. I was sipping my coffee, in fact. Then I looked up and realized SHOOT she's out of my sight, where is she where is she she better not be peeing on the couch crap whereISSHE!?!??! And she was in the bathroom. Sitting on the potty. Saying "Poop, Mama. Potty."

OH. HELL. YES.

Granted, we later had a naptime diaper poop with a very small amount on her hand, a poop in the panties on the way to the potty, and a small turd on the floor (which I also missed, but found out about when she walked into the kitchen and opened the cabinet where we keep the rags, saying "Tlean. Tlean, Mama." Don't know how a TL sound is easier than a CL, but there you go.) but still. We had contained, potty poop. There is hope.

She is by no means trained yet. Not one of those "oh, yeah, my kid trained in a day. It was nothing. I just said "pee goes in the potty" and they were all over it." Which is unfortunate, because I've been told I was one of those kids. Sigh.

But it's going well thus far. We shall see how tomorrow goes. Also, Nate gets home tonight. Yay!

The view from the throne. Watching some "Gabba" to try and keep butt in seat.

"Pee! Treat, Mama!"

Refusing help on the long, splashy walk to the bathroom.

Waving bye-bye to the peeps.

"ZOMG HANDWASHING!!!1!!!11!!"

Potty training toolz. M&M's, alcohol with lunch, Mary statue for inspiration.

The overview of my wreck of a living room. Yoooooooo Gabba Gabba!

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It isn't all sunshine and rainbows... except when it is.

I'm up way too late, as usual. And Nate is out of town for a few days, so there isn't anyone here to tell me to "go to sleep already, this is the reason you're so tired all the time".But I'm sitting here on the couch, just hanging out with a sleeping baby snuggled up on my chest. She really is an amazingly good baby. As most of you know, I am NOT a baby person in general. But this little kiddo... She only cries when she is hungry or needs a diaper change (Or when she get smacked in head with a travel coffee mug. My bad on that one.) and even then she settles down pretty easily.

Normally when she falls asleep in the evening I put her in the swing and do whatever, have my on-my-own time. Tonight though, I'm just holding her. She's so snuggly. And her little cheeks are just so kissable.

Miss Violet just chillin' on a hideously awesome couch while vacationing in Virginia Beach.

In conclusion, I need to get some sleep. I just wanted to make sure people don't get the wrong impression, with all the complaining I normally do on this here blog. I do love these kids to bits.

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Ugh.

So, I haven't really been sleeping. And I can't even blame it on either baby, they're (knock on wood) pretty good sleepers. Fiona rarely wakes up during the night, and Violet, well, we're still co-sleeping/nursing, so most of the time all it takes is for me to roll over and stuff a boob in her mouth and she's back out.

Once I'm asleep, I sleep just fine. I slept through my alarm TWICE this week, which really sucks because as a babysitter, I'm not the only one that's late. My tardiness has a ripple effect on my employers. I did get there on time today though, so that was good.

It's the falling asleep that's the problem. It started Saturday, when I didn't fall asleep until 5am. Sunday it was 3. Monday and Tuesday 2, and last night about 2:30. Which really doesn't work out so well, when you consider that I have to be up for work at 6:30. Last night I was fiiiiiiiiinally falling asleep, and then I heard Fiona very clearly say "Mama?" and it sounded like she was right in the doorway of our room and I was like "How in the hell did she get out of her crib?" and so I tried to answer her but I couldn't make any noise and I realized I was asleep so I WOKE myself up with a start and said "go back to bed, honey" at which point Nate rolled over and mumbled something to the effect of "Did you say something?" But of course she wasn't in the doorway. She was asleep. In her crib. Like a normal person. And I now had to begin the process of falling asleep all over again.

It's really starting to be a problem. I can sometimes grab a little nap during the day, but it's hard to time things to make that happen. I forgo the old adage "Sleep when the baby sleeps", and substitute my own version, which is usually something along the lines of "Sleep while the one baby sleeps and the other baby is strapped in to her high chair eating a freeze-pop and watching Yo Gabba Gabba". It works.

Except when it doesn't. Today was a big day. Grocery shopping day. I've been meaning to go since we got home from MA a week ago. I was understandably nervous about this trip, because it was to be my first time going alone with both the girls. And we all know how I feel about grocery shopping anyways...(ps, Wegman's carts still suck. Who thought it would be a good idea to redesign them so that they can hold LESS groceries?) (oh, and shoutout to the very cool woman who was shopping with her 6-month-old, who told me that her older daughter was 2 also, and gave me nice words of encouragement.) (I would also like to send an ANTI-shoutout to the meddlesome old lady who stopped and told me that she "...hopes I don't take this the wrong way, but she has 4 children, so she knows... The baby in there[my Moby wrap which I LOVE], it's not safe. It's breathing it's own air. I don't mean to interfere, but I just love babies!" Really, lady? You think I don't? Hello, it's a freaking PIECE OF FABRIC that is actually QUITE open up near her head. She can breath. Thanks. Go choke on a prune.)

Where was I. Grocery shopping. So whatever, I finally did the shopping, it was largely uneventful. Which of course meant I was SUPER proud of myself and seriously called three people and was all "dooood I went grocery shopping! Aren't I awesome! Aren't you proud of me? What? You have to go? You don't actually care? You shop for groceries too? Oh." And then I remembered that my life must be pretty boring if grocery shopping is exciting. And then I figured I hadn't bored enough people yet, so I better blog about it, too! Yay!

Oh, I had a doctor appt this afternoon, too. Which I scheduled for 2pm. Cause it's always nice to have an appointment smack in the middle of nap time.

I had big plans for dinner (yummy but fairly simple-to-make spicy orange glazed chicken and green beans and corn bread), but between the shopping and the waking babies up from naps to go the doctors office, and the whole 4 hours of sleep I got last night (in two 2-hour chunks), I was totally beat. When Nate got home I just went into the kitchen and started grabbing things for dinner. Chicken nuggets. Oooh, French fries. Here, have this leftover white cheddar mac&cheese. Oh, a vegetable...let's see, we've got... corn. As I set Fiona's plate down on her tray, I realized I was serving them chicken and three different kinds of starch. Plus milk. Awesome. The meal was so white it was blinding. (Well, it wasn't all like white white, it was more a mix of white, yellow, and light brown, but same thing.) Never a good thing, having a monochromatic meal like that.

So I did the only thing I could do; I started crying about serving three starches at one meal. Cause that's normal.

I really hope I sleep tonight.

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You can't make this shit up.

My new position as "Supervisor of two small monsters, specializing in shit removal" has kept me quite busy. I've been alone (during the day) with these two for a week now, so at this point I feel totally deserving of those "oh wow, how do you do it?" looks and comments I get at the mall/grocery store/church/doctor's office/etc. Before that my wonderful too-good-to-be-true silver tea set sister was here with me for nearly a month. (Points if you get that reference) And she got here the same day that Nate went back to work. He was home for two weeks. And before that, well, I hadn't been promoted yet. Before that I was just working as "Pregger Mother of One".
Seriously, it's been two months since I posted. I'm not even sure I have the time/energy/memory to recap. Suffice it to say we've been busy. That whole eat/sleep/shit/repeat routine is brutal.
Speaking of shit. My toddler is some kind of artist, with human fecal matter being her medium of choice. I'm not sure what this says about her future (the internet has plenty to say, of course, but from what I've gathered, it's only autism if the kid engaging in poop play is much older than this little one.), but for the here and now? I alternate between anger, frustration, defeat, and laughter. Her favorite place to play is in her crib. Turns out those three hour naps? Sort of more an hour and a half of nap followed by and hour and half of playing with crap. Literally. Sometimes we are greeted with fresh murals in the morning. She wakes up quietly, that one. If you put her down to bed (nighttime or naptime) in anything less than full leggings with a onesie overtop (it's her 80's aerobics instructor look), she's digging in that dipe the moment it gets filled.
And then occasionally there is the middle-of-the-day play. This is usually less artwork, more "props". For example, one day she was playing with her play dishes, making a snack and pretending to eat it. I failed to notice at first that she was playing with real raisins. From the day before. That had recently seen the inside of an intestine.

Today's minor fiasco involved the Fisher Price farm set. I was sitting on the couch, nursing the baby, watching Fiona play so nicely over there with her toys. What a good girl she is. Violet fell asleep, I placed her into her swing, and went over to join Fiona. And then I saw it. Manure. Actual shit in the little cart that hooks to the back of the farmer's tractor. Carrots and raisins, from the look of it. Creative, this one.

I sternly informed her that no, we do NOT play with poop. And then laughed my head off, internally. Because seriously. What else can you do?

I'm off to google "my toddler plays with poop" to see if anybody else has any worse stories to make me feel better, and "how can I tell if my toddler is ready for potty training" because I'm pretty sure we are heading in that direction very very soon...

"Moo, moooooo"
This was, of course, after I'd cleaned all things poopy. I'm not that bad of a parent.

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